Vol 54: Issue 41

Politics

Nation Not Sure How Many Ex-Trump Staffers It Can Safely Reabsorb
American Voices, Opinion

Stephen Hawking’s Final Paper Revealed
American Voices, Opinion

Bill And Hillary Clinton Announce Joint Tour
News, News In Brief

Sully Sullenberger Realizes It Too Late Now To Let Everyone Know Plane Did All That Stuff On Autopilot
Local

Mom Hates Bad Guy In Movie
Entertainment

Kanye West Jumps On Massage Table To Deliver Speech About Relaxation
Entertainment, Magazine

This Bitter Couple Tells Us The Secret To A 3-Year, 5-Month, And 2-Week Marriage
Sports

Panicked Falcons Discover Scratch In Mercedes Benz Stadium
Politics

Trump Administration Urges Saudis To Stick To Killing Random Yemeni Civilians
Politics

Frightened Don Jr. Asks If He Can Sleep In Dad’s Bed After Bad Dream About Being Indicted
Politics

Report: Many States Still Relying On Outdated Methods To Disenfranchise Voters
Local

Woman Always Gets Best Ideas While Taking Shower With Two Jacked Dudes
News, News In Brief

Panicked Meteorologists Advise Entire Nation To Take Cover After Losing Track Of Hurricane Michael
News, News In Photos

Rick Scott Orders Hurricane Michael To Evacuate From Florida
News, News In Brief

‘The Convergence Is At Hand,’ Announces Sears CEO As Employees Report To Company Headquarters In White Gowns
American Voices, Opinion

Hurricane Michael Makes Landfall In Most Dangerous Storm In Florida Panhandle History
News, News In Brief

Salamanders Bravely Offer To Go Extinct In Place Of Better Animal

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