RockStar Games Begins Imprisoning Programmers For ‘Red Dead Redemption 3’

Good news for fans of RockStar’s blockbuster western franchise! The studio announced this week that it had already started imprisoning programmers to kickstart the development of Red Dead Redemption 3.

“We’ve herded an incredibly talented team of programmers into holding pens, and they’re already hard at work making sure Red Dead 3 is the most immersive installment in franchise history,” Rockstar producer and company president Sam Houser told us by phone, explaining that the dedicated team of coders were fully committed to working around-the-clock shifts in their windowless cells until the open-world sequel gets into gamers’ hands. “After their first few days chained to their workstations without any sleep, these guys put together a pretty killer demo of what a next-gen Wild West experience might look like. And that’s with breaks every 12 hours to use their metal toilets or make their one phone call to say goodbye to family and friends. It just makes us more excited than ever to see the kind of revolutionary game mechanics they’ll put together once we take away the team’s food and water during crunch.”

Exciting stuff! But if you’re hoping to join the hallowed ranks who get to work on this surefire blockbuster, think again: RockStar told us they’ve already rejected over 200 applications for positions in their programming cages.


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