Woman Has No Business Being An Extrovert

SAN ANTONIO, TX—Explaining that the character trait does not seem to suit her well, acquaintances of local woman Mary Randolph told reporters Wednesday that the 32-year-old accountant really has no business being an extrovert. “She’s great at putting herself out there, but then as soon as she starts talking to people it’s like she doesn’t even register a single response or social cue she gets from anyone else in the room—I’m not sure if having an outgoing personality is really the best fit for her,” said coworker Jenna Hospodor, adding that Randolph routinely attempts to initiate friendly conversations with colleagues who are clearly too busy for a casual chat and will excitedly speak up in meetings one beat after everyone else has inferred a discussion is over. “She’s always launching into these really personal anecdotes in public areas like the break room or the elevator, and she doesn’t seem to notice when she’s making everyone around her uncomfortable. In a sense, it’s great that she’s so confident, but she’d probably be much better off if she was a withdrawn and reserved kind of person.” Hospodor added that her coworker also had no business being so nice, as it makes it hard to criticize her without coming off as catty.