Trump vs. Biden On Free Speech

While Democrats position themselves as supporters of the First Amendment, many believe the government’s reaction to public protests looked no different under Joe Biden than it did under Donald Trump. The Onion presents an in-depth examination of how free speech has been viewed by both administrations.

Donald Trump on free speech:

Averting one’s gaze from the U.S. flag punishable by up to five years in federal prison.

Now replaced by new and improved Trump Speech, official protected speech rights authorized by the president himself, only $59.99 per act.

Three slur minimum.

Agrees with Justice Robert H. Jackson’s 1943 opinion on West Virginia State Board of Education v. Barnette.

Saying whatever pops into your head.

Would like to punch protester in face.

Joe Biden on free speech:

Freedom to trail off mid-sentence and stare blankly into the distance.

Expanded protections so that corporations can speak their minds freely.

Not available on weekends.

Protesters brutalized in a more democratic way.

Police can handle that.

Would like to punch protester in face.