The Onion’s Guide To Twitch

Twitch is the leading site for livestreaming video games, with over 15 million active daily users. The Onion presents a guide to everything you need to know about Twitch.


Q: How does Twitch work?

A: Players livestream games to build a fanbase with the hope that one day fans will pay them to be racist.


Q: So it’s for watching people play video games?

A: Yep.


Q: Are girls allowed?

A: Sure. If they keep quiet, they can watch.


Q: Could I just quit my job and play video games on Twitch?

A: Yes, we’re all doing it and we’re getting rich.


Q: How do people make money on Twitch?

A: By screaming movie quotes until a 12-year-old steals their parent’s credit card and donates.


Q: What does Twitch consider hate speech?

A: Anything that unfairly maligns minority groups such as ghost-type Pokémon.


Q: Could you stream pay-per-view events and charge viewers money?

A: Oh yeah.


Q: I thought Twitch was a gaming platform, why so many nudity rules?

A: People, you know?