Some of the world’s most beloved people have died over the past 4.5 billion years. Here are a few:
Medieval peasant Hadriel Rolfe passed away on Mar. 7, 1163, after repeated amputations failed to stop the bleeding. |
Cro-Magnon Grok, 20, drowned in a river in 24,900 B.C. after a failed attempt to eat his own reflection. |
Well-respected London surgeon Edmund Thompson passed away at home having successfully gone through life without anyone ever finding out he was Jack the Ripper. |
Marie Curie, bless her heart, died from illnesses contracted during a cute little scientific career that was instrumental in the eventual discovery of the microwave oven. |
Jesus of Nazareth, 33, was a gentle soul who enjoyed forgiveness, performing miracles, and dying for the sins of mankind. He is survived by Jesus Christ. |
Fluffy Jones, 8, a good cat who deserved so much better than an old shoe box in the backyard. |
Djedefre, pharaoh of Egypt’s Fourth Dynasty and a great proponent of geometric architecture and reed-boating, died at 32 after a sudden onset of alligators. He left a wife, Djekshetsut, and two daughters, Djennifer and Djulie. |