Vol 53: Issue 36

Sports

Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want
Sports

NFL Introduces New Challenge Flares
Sports

CBS Loses Dan Fouts For Season After Blowing Out Larynx On Routine Anecdote
Sports

New Oregon Jerseys Display Fine Print Of Nike Contract
American Voices, Opinion

Facebook Allowed Advertisers To Target ‘Jew Haters’
News, News In Brief

Cassini Probe Realizes Too Late This Was A Setup All Along
News, News In Brief

Experts Report $37 Amount Of Money You Need To Donate To Hurricane Relief In Order To Completely Forget About It
News, News In Brief

Nation’s Journalists Remember Quaint Time When ‘Huffington Post’ Seemed Like Death Of News Industry
Politics

Hope Hicks Praying She Not Still In Same Shitty Job By Time She Hits 30
Sports

Brian Cushing: ‘I Did Not Know There Were PEDs In The Steroids I Took’
News, News In Brief

Hydra Decides To See Doctor About Painful Ingrown Head
Politics

Exhausted John Kelly Parks President In Front Of Episode Of ‘Tucker Carlson’ To Get Quick Hour To Himself
News, News In Brief

Google Now Giving Female Employees Free Day Each Week To Work On Lawsuits
American Voices, Opinion

Study: Mice Healthier On Extremely High-Fat Diet
Cartoons, Opinion

Irma Gonna Be Sick
American Voices, Opinion

Martin Shkreli Jailed Over Clinton Hair Bounty
Sports

Greatest College Football Rivalries

Unlock ‘The Onion’ Vault

Journey through 268 years of highly acclaimed, universally revered reporting. The Onion‘s archives comprise the most powerful and influential news coverage in human history.

Explore More

Historical front pages from The Onion's historical archive.