Vol 52: Issue 25

American Voices, Opinion

Synthetic Tree Removes CO2 From Air
Local

Dad’s Eyes Well Up At Sight Of Perfectly Packed Cooler
Dispatch, News

Investigators: First 48 Hours Most Critical In Locating Missing Children Who Entered Portal To Fantastical World
News, News In Brief

Man Not Sure Why Girlfriend Having Him Hang Cluster Of Empty Picture Frames But Willing To Go With It
News, News In Brief

Secretary Of Interior Unveils Plans For New High-Speed Creek
American Voices, Opinion

Cats Understand Laws Of Physics
Entertainment

Director Has Clear Vision Of How Studio Will Destroy Movie
Infographic, News

Tips For Handling Social Anxieties
News, News In Brief

Man Driving While Making YouTube Video To Explain How PC Culture Destroying America
American Voices, Opinion

‘Five-Second Rule’ Disproven
Local

Grandma Excited To Show Off New Beach Sweater
Entertainment, Horoscopes

Your Horoscopes — Week Of June 28, 2016
Local

Man Has Loyalty To Pretzel Brand
American Voices, Opinion

Robot Programmed To Feel Pain
Cartoons, Opinion

The British Evasion
Entertainment

The Week In Pictures – Week Of June 27, 2016
American Voices, Opinion

70% Of Earth Can’t See Milky Way

Unlock ‘The Onion’ Vault

Journey through 268 years of highly acclaimed, universally revered reporting. The Onion‘s archives comprise the most powerful and influential news coverage in human history.

Explore More

Historical front pages from The Onion's historical archive.