Vol 45: Issue 39

Entertainment

Greed In America
Sports

NFL Scientists Postulate Theoretical Down Before First Down
Onion Public Radio, Podcasts

Entire Planet Feels Like It's Being Watched
Sports

'Billy Beane Of Office Softball' Profiled In Book 'MoneySoftball'
Onion Public Radio, Podcasts

Army Of Dead Has No Problem Meeting Recruitment Goal
News, News In Photos

Jealous GPS Clearly Wants Man To Back Over Wife
Sports

Confused NASCAR Driver Runs Over 30 Golfers During Attempt To Win FedEx Cup
Local

Surprise Witness Punches Out Prosecutor
Politics

Cat Congress Mired In Sunbeam
Entertainment

So You Think You Can Consistently Attract The 18-To-34 Demographic
Sports

John Maine Takes Pitch Requests At Poorly Attended Mets-Nationals Game
Politics

Obama Trying Out Social Policies In 'Second Life'
Entertainment

Mackenzie Phillips Had Sex With Father
Dispatch, News

Sexy Career Woman To Take Hot Bath After Stressful Day
Local

One Man's Chilling Tale Of Needing To Get To An ATM Pretty Soon
Sports

Andy Reid Carted Onto Field To Shake Hands With Sean Payton
Commentary, Opinion

My Living Nightmare Of Encouraging Kids To Read Is Over

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