Study Finds Salmon Complete Transatlantic Voyage Using Same Teleportation Chamber As Ancestors

CAMBRIDGE—Shedding new light on the breeding patterns of the species, an oceanography study published Thursday by Harvard scientists revealed that salmon complete their annual transatlantic voyage using the same teleportation chamber as their ancestors. “This discovery helps solve the mystery of how these fish are able to travel hundreds of thousands of miles through the ocean to make it back to the rivers and streams where they were born,” said lead researcher Andy Nkosi, confirming that each generation of fish passes the exact geographic coordinates to press into the mass transporter’s keypad on to their offspring. “It’s fascinating to see how nature has responded to this unique ecological practice—it’s not an uncommon sight to see bears standing in wait right outside the teleporter in the hopes of catching a salmon as they resolidify after warping to fresh water.” Nkosi added that the salmon typically died shortly after spawning due to their destabilized DNA making their bodies disintegrate.