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Space Weather May Have Caused Mass Whale Deaths

A rash of sperm whale deaths in 2016 may have been caused by solar storms interfering with the animals’ navigation systems, leading them to beach themselves accidentally. What do you think?

Patricia Snowden • Pavement Flattener

“But space is usually so lovely that time of year.”

Patricia Snowden • Pavement Flattener

Dan Rankin • Cinnamon Importer

“These whales need to take responsibility for themselves and not follow every magnetic impulse they have.”

Dan Rankin • Cinnamon Importer

Gerald Abbott • Flautist

“Hopefully the court accepts a similar explanation for why I was driving my truck on the sidewalk like that.”

Gerald Abbott • Flautist