Several Wendy’s Menu Items Added To Periodic Table As Part Of New Sponsorship Deal

WASHINGTON—In a collaboration that all involved touted as an innovative step forward in the world of food science, several Wendy’s menu items were reportedly added to the periodic table of elements Thursday as part of a new sponsorship deal. “We are pleased to welcome the Baconator, the Hot Honey Chicken Sandwich, and other delicious Wendy’s classics to the periodic table, where they’ll sit side by side with beloved gases and metals like oxygen, lutetium, and zinc,” read a joint statement released by the American Chemical Society and Wendy’s to announce the new deal, which included several hypothetical breakfast menu items that exist in theory but have not yet been synthesized. “Fans of Wendy’s and chemical properties alike will enjoy some of our more ambitious collaborations, which include a limited-time series of Noble Gas Sandwiches, as well as a combo deal that allows you to get a medium Frosty for just 99 cents with the purchase of any actinide. It’s a great chance to enjoy science and a hearty meal at the same time. This offer is available at all participating restaurants and chemical laboratories nationwide.” According to reports, the sponsorship has met with backlash from diners complaining about the new radioactive Moscovium Nuggets, whose atomic bonds typically fall apart 100 milliseconds after being served to customers.