Scientists Warn Sky Running Out Of Good Puffy Clouds

NEW YORK—In a breakthrough study with a stark prediction about present meteorological trends, a team of scientists at Columbia University warned Monday that the sky was rapidly running out of the good puffy clouds. “Based on the current trajectory, we expect that big fluffy clouds will be entirely gone from the sky by 2050, and we’ll be left with those flat ugly ones,” said lead researcher Nancy Armstrong, who described the alarming trajectory for clouds that looked as though they were “so big and comfy and poofy” you could just lie down in them like a huge cozy bed in the sky. “In the future, we’ll still have plenty of wispy clouds and gray boring ones. But the ones that are like giant marshmallows? Those are already hitting dangerously low levels. Pretty soon the sky will really suck.” Armstrong added that she was pretty sure the scientific term for those nice clouds was something like cormulus.