RFK Jr. Offered Multiple Cabinet Positions In RFK Jr.’s Administration, RFK Jr. Reports

MALIBU, CA—According to a statement issued by Robert F. Kennedy Jr., Robert F. Kennedy Jr. received an offer Thursday for multiple Cabinet positions in a potential administration of Robert F. Kennedy Jr. “I am honored that a leader as admirable as RFK Jr. would consider RFK Jr. for positions as important as secretary of state, secretary of transportation, and attorney general, among a dozen others,” said the independent presidential candidate Robert F. Kennedy Jr., who confirmed that Robert F. Kennedy Jr. had been promised multiple executive department roles in exchange for an enthusiastic endorsement of Robert F. Kennedy Jr. “I gladly took a meeting with myself—actually, I took many meetings with myself—and they were very productive. In fact, I look forward to accepting hundreds of other positions as well, from U.S. ambassador to France, Kenya, and Argentina to White House communications intern.” At press time, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. had reportedly been eliminated from consideration for any Cabinet role after his past remarks on the cause of AIDS came to light.