Report: Recently Laid-Off Workers Not Doing Enough To Help Economy

WASHINGTON, DC— According to a Labor Department report released Monday, Americans who lost their jobs in the past year are doing little to aid the recovery of the nation’s economy. “Unemployed Americans are neglecting their patriotic duties by spending far less than the gainfully employed,” the report read. “Until these laid-off workers start pitching in and buying things, America’s economy will continue to stagnate.” The report did note that jobless citizens have strongly supported America’s fortified-wine industry.