Real Estate Developers Decide Colorful Bench Enough To Deem Area ‘Arts District’

LANSING, MI—In an effort to maximize the return on a newly constructed property they were trying to sell, local real estate developers Wellstone & Associates on Tuesday reportedly decided that a nearby colorful bench was enough to deem the area an “arts district.” “The bench is red, yellow, green and blue, and it looks like someone, somewhere put a little bit of creativity into its design, so for our listing purposes I think we can go ahead and call this a trendy up-and-coming artist mecca,” said developer Kelsey Cross, adding that seeing a bearded man in a flannel shirt walking by was probably sufficient to tell potential buyers that this was the neighborhood where all the creative types hung out. “There’s some nice yellow flowers over there, and there’s a couple restaurants with colorful signage that you could probably say bring an ‘authentic flair’ or something like that. Plus there’s all that green space in the area between the road and sidewalk kind of near where that colorful bench is. Yeah, this is a thriving arts district for sure.” The real estate developers also reportedly decided that the presence of a Starbucks three miles from the building’s site was enough to declare the area had a “charming local cafe culture.”