Popular New Podcast Just Mark Ruffalo Reading Names Of Murder Victims

NEW YORK—Noting its meteoric rise to the top of the charts, sources confirmed Wednesday that popular new podcast Ruff Stuff was just actor Mark Ruffalo reading out the names of murder victims. “I’m overwhelmed by the outpouring of positive reception, and grateful for the opportunity to create content that clearly resonates so strongly with fans,” said Ruffalo, thanking his millions of listeners for their support of the show, which consisted of weekly 2-hour-long episodes in which the actor simply stated the first and last names of American homicide victims, pausing only occasionally for the tinkle of a piano or an ad break from a sponsor. “When I first launched Ruff Stuff two weeks ago, I had no idea I’d be creating one of the most streamed podcasts of all time. I actually just received word from Spotify that last week’s “All Larrys” episode has already surpassed over 1 billion downloads. And keep listening, because soon I’m going to shake things up by having some of my friends from the Avengers cast join me to silently hold the list still while I read.” At press time, Netflix announced they had bought the rights to adapt Ruff Stuff into a series for $20 million.