PBS To Air More Of That Yanni Shit

NEW YORK—Reaffirming its commitment to the Greek-mustachioed-New-Age-synthesizer arts, PBS announced Monday that it will continue to air loads of that Yanni shit. “We’ve barely begun,” PBS’ Donald Gehl said. “If you don’t like Yanni, oh, man. You’d better not watch PBS any time during the next 55 months.” Among the upcoming events: Yanni at the Acropolis, Astrodome, Great Wall, Wailing Wall and Wall Drug. The programs will be periodically interrupted by pledge breaks, during which on-air hosts will attempt to keep a straight face while going on about how only PBS brings the great music of Yanni into their homes.