Onion Public Radio, Podcasts Paranoid Optimist Thinks Everyone Is Out To Get Him A Present Published: November 23, 2006 Advertising Ohio State Defeats Michigan 42-39 In Ultimately Meaningless Game Continued on next page Explore Tags Vol 42: Issue 47 Related Coverage The Final Episode Of The Topical Papa John’s Comes Under Fire For Cruel Treatment Of The Bulbous, Deformed Creatures That Lactate Pizza Sauce Scientists Warn Americans To Stay Away From That Bird