NFL Vows To Fix Bottomless Pit On Levi’s Stadium Field Before Super Bowl

SANTA CLARA, CA—Following persistent safety concerns regarding the playing surface throughout the regular season, the NFL made firm assurances Friday to both the Denver Broncos and Carolina Panthers that the bottomless pit in the middle of the field at Levi’s Stadium will be fully repaired before Super Bowl 50. “The Super Bowl is the biggest sporting event in the world, and we are working closely with Levi’s Stadium to ensure that the turf’s bottomless pit will not be an issue come game time,” NFL field director Ed Mangan said of the 14-foot-diameter hole situated near the 40-yard line, adding that the risk of a player accidentally slipping and being lost forever in an infinite black void is “something the league takes very seriously.” “We certainly want to avoid another incident like the one earlier this season when [St. Louis Rams safety] T.J. McDonald fell into the abyss and his screams just grew fainter and fainter without anyone ever hearing him hit the ground. The league will do everything in its power to minimize the potential of something like that happening on Sunday.” At press time, the NFL had declared that the field is “ready for the Super Bowl” after Levi’s Stadium grounds crews had covered the pit with a large wooden board.