While Christmas is supposed to be filled with family, food, and holiday cheer, many Americans instead choose to spend it alone, in front of a computer, with their hands down their pants. The following are the most common porn searches made during the holidays.
Spiral Ham Cum Shot
Ejaculating on a magnificent roast is the perfect way to finish on Christmas.
Stepsister Learns Meaning Of Christmas
Just because she’s a slutty nympho who caught you masturbating doesn’t mean she’s heartless.
Bluey Ultimate Lights And Sounds Playhouse Overnight Shipping
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, we can’t believe we forgot about this.
Busty Woman Receives Socks
She’ll be happy she has them when it gets cold.
Normal Family Having Nice Time With Sober Mom
Porn viewers’ fantasies tend to run wild on holidays.
Step-Santa Stuck In Chimney
The sexual tension has been mounting between you and your dad’s new Santa for years, and now they’re stuck in a precarious position and need your help.
Elves Casting Couch
They’re young, impressionable, and need work.
Glory Hole Advent Calendar
Twenty-five holes, unlimited ways to bang.
3 Wise Men Get Each Other Off In Manger
The frankincense is involved in ways you can’t imagine.
Suicide Hotline
People frequently mistake the search bar for Google.
Rankin/Bass Hentai
An entire subcategory is devoted to Snow Miser’s nose.
Man Fucks Pumpkin
Sure, it’s been at the top of the list since Halloween, but it still does the job.
Mrs. Claus Stuck In Dryer
Elves have a lot of dirty, dirty laundry.
Circumcised Man Puts Menorah In Ass
Jewish people can enjoy the holiday season, too.
‘The Santa Clause’ Uncut Version
Every year Tim Allen fans search, and every year they’re disappointed.
Cuck Watches Mommy Kissing Santa Claus
There’s nothing hotter than watching a mythical, gift-giving reimagining of a saint plow your wife.
Elves Bukkake Mrs. Clause
When they’re not making toys, they’re still keeping busy.
Husband Presents Thoughtful Gift Instead of Gift Card
Every middle-aged mother’s deepest desire.
Mr. Hands But With Reindeer
Watching regular old horse sex is for the other 364 days of the year.
Shaved Grinch Fingers
This violates Pornhub’s community guidelines.
Voyeur Santa Dressing
Incredibly erotic watching a 60-year-old step into a pair of galoshes.
Crackling Fireplace 10 Hours
Hey, if you’re paying for Pornhub premium, you might as well use it.
Sex
Guests are arriving any minute—there’s no time to reinvent the wheel here.
The 12 Gays Of Christmas
Fast-forward to the three French men scene.
Incest
It’s just nice to see at least one family getting along.
