McDonald's Introduces New 6-Piece Chicken NcNoltes

OAK BROOK, IL—Touting its latest menu offering as a grizzled, tough, and brashly exciting dining option, McDonald’s CEO Don Thompson officially launched the company’s new six-piece Chicken NcNoltes meal at a press event Wednesday. “America spoke and we listened—our new Chicken NcNoltes have the mouth-watering gristle, crusty seasoning, and leathery texture that our customers have been clamoring for,” Thompson told gathered reporters, noting that the new product is made with only the most weathered and world-weary portions of all-white meat. “Whether you’re in the mood for a gruff, imposing dinner, or simply searching for a snack that looks like it’s on the verge of completely falling apart, our six-piece Chicken NcNoltes are certain to hit the spot.” Thompson added that the new Chicken NcNoltes paired perfectly with the chain’s mild and likable Ruffalo Sauce.