,

McDonald’s To Launch New Spinoff Restaurant ‘CosMc’s’

McDonald’s is opening its pilot location of CosMc’s, a spinoff restaurant based on a space alien mascot from commercials in the ’80s and ’90s, in Bollingbrook, IL, where it will offer all-new menu items such as a tomatillo sandwich. What do you think?

Clinton Berg, Candle Inspector

“I don’t know if Illinois is ready for a fast food restaurant.”

Clinton Berg, Candle Inspector

Marisela Knowles, Robotics Lab Janitor

“Surprising, since McDonald’s itself didn’t really take off.”

Marisela Knowles, Robotics Lab Janitor

Damien Luanda, Systems Analyst

“Why not, I’ll try a new type of slop.”

Damien Luanda, Systems Analyst




Sample front page of The Onion's DNC paper