Man At Strip Club Buffet Pays Extra To Get Private Time In Backroom With Buffalo Wing

PEABODY, MA—Saying he was looking forward to a more up-close-and-personal experience, local man Todd Hampton reportedly paid extra at the Déjà Vu strip club buffet Friday to get some private time in the backroom with a buffalo wing. “Oh yeah, ever since I stepped in the club I’ve had my eyes on this pretty little number,” said Hampton, licking his lips as he asked a nearby bouncer how much time $150 would buy him in the darkened VIP backroom, where he would be allowed to bring to life his wildest fantasies with the Sriracha-glazed wing. “They’ll let you do anything back there: whatever sauces you want. No napkins necessary. You can even nibble on the bone. Christ, this is gonna be hot.” At press time, a visibly embarrassed Hampton was seen rushing out of the backroom early with a large obvious stain on his pants from ranch dressing.