,

For Sale By Owner Who’s In Way Over His Head

Two-bedroom townhouse only 15 minutes from downtown and, Jesus Christ, what was I thinking trying to sell this all by myself? It’s too late to go get a realtor now because I know my wife will be all smug about it, after I insisted I could do this myself and save a ton of money. God. I think we’ll just not move.




Sample front page of The Onion's DNC paper