Moms for Liberty is a highly influential, highly controversial Republican-affiliated organization that fights to ban vaccine mandates, critical race theory, and gay rights from schools. The Onion outlines everything you need to know about Moms for Liberty.
Opinion On Vaccine Mandate
Opposed, but have enough kids that they can afford to lose a few.
Original Name
“Moms for the Preservation of Anglo-Saxon Bloodlines in an Increasingly Mongrelized Population”
Founded
In Florida. Obviously.
Number Of Children Protected
Zero.
Southern Poverty Law Center Ranking
Three and a half goebbels.
Logo
A woman attacking a gay person using a tray of brownies.
Hunting Style
In packs.
Typical Prey
School board members.
Affiliation with MILFs
More crossover than people would like to admit.
Favorite Book
Fifty Shades Of Grey
Most-Burnt Book
The Scarlet Letter
Community Outreach
Hold free, weekly lessons on how to bully gay kids.
Platform
Advocate for removing LGBTQ+ rights, inclusivity, and critical race theory from school curricula, as well as adding soft pretzels with cheese to school cafeterias.
Membership Requirements
Initiates are required to have one confirmed kill of a published author.
Stance On Quoting Hitler In Newsletter
Against, as they usually just plagiarize his writing without acknowledgement.
Mascot
A dog detective who inspects children’s genitals.
List Of Disney Characters They Approve Of
Walt.
View On Moms For Liberty–Branded Travel Mug
At $30, a genuine steal!
