Disney’s Hall Of Presidents Opens Exhibit Of Historic Shadow Leaders Who Really Ran Country

ORLANDO, FL—Eschewing its typical round of publicity, Disney World quietly opened a side exhibit within its Hall Of Presidents attraction Wednesday featuring the historic shadow leaders who have really run the country since its founding. “The show takes place in a narrow hallway, which is only accessible via an unmarked door off a side antechamber, and begins with a slideshow showing the history of cabinet officials, members of national security, and foreign business leaders controlling the direction of our nation,” said Disney blogger Carol Flannigan, confirming that the presentation concluded with lifelike animatronic figures of the dozens of industrialists and decision makers who have always wielded influence behind the scenes. “It was a really fun way to learn about history—there’s a whole section about Edith Wilson secretly taking power when her husband was in a coma, and I don’t want to spoil Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld’s big speech about 9/11, but it was pretty amazing.” At press time, rumors remained unconfirmed of an even more difficult-to-access side display within the exhibit featuring the lizard people who, in actuality, really control everything.