Congress Votes To Intervene In Local Wedding

WASHINGTON, DC–The U.S. Senate voted 64-30 Monday to obstruct next Sunday’s marriage of Phoenix’s Todd Wexler and Marisa Park. “It is clear to this legislative body that Mr. Wexler is a total jerk,” said Sen. Wayne Allard (R-CO) following Monday’s vote. “Miss Park can do a lot better.” Federal agents will be posted outside the wedding chapel with orders to step in if any vow-taking occurs.