Local Coffee Made, Poured, Consumed Without Single Conscious Thought Published: May 12, 2020 https://store.theonion.com/collections/house/products/the-onions-i-wish-i-were-dead-coffee-mug Advertising Eighth Grader Would Have Cranked Classroom Pencil Sharpener Few More Times If She Knew That Going To Be Last Chance Continued on next page Explore Tags Vol 56: Issue 19 Related Coverage Actor Informed Producers Decided To Go With A Dog For The Role Man Not Really Articulating Cohesive Reason Why Guy Who Cut Him Off Should Go Fuck Himself Ohioan Disturbed By Reports Of Haitians Eating Vegetables