Boss' Threats Hilarious

KNOXVILLE, TN—Employees working under Champion Direct Marketing manager Dale Farner found his threats during a Monday meeting hysterical, sources told reporters. “If you like your job here, you’ll start to shape up,” Farner said, reprimanding a group of his underlings working in CDM’s basement offices. “You think your jobs are guaranteed? Think again. I can replace any one of you, just like that. There are plenty of folks out there who would take pride in telephone sales.” The employees, most of whom will quit before the end of summer, broke into giggles when Farner threatened to cancel the staff summer picnic.