Area Man Asked To Shoot Janice An E-mail

DOVER, MD—According to fellow employees who observed the scene, office assistant Brian Rockwell has been asked to shoot Janice an e-mail whenever he gets a sec later today. The request to dash off the message was ordered by company head Dan Etling, who reportedly realized the five-minute conversation he had had with Rockwell earlier this morning dealt primarily with problems in “Janice’s territory.” “Go ahead and cc me on it,” Etling was overheard saying. Rockwell later disclosed to reporters that he would get right on it, and expects Janice to respond by zipping those files on back to him ASAP.