Nickelodeon Offers To Buy TV Rights To Jennette McCurdy’s New Memoir

NEW YORK—Claiming the trauma experienced by former iCarly star had all the makings of television gold, Nickelodeon reportedly offered Thursday to buy the TV rights to Jennette McCurdy’s new memoir I’m Glad My Mom Died. “Nickelodeon would like to submit a bid to secure the rights to Jennette McCurdy’s harrowing memoir of abuse as a child actor on our network,” said Nickelodeon president Brian Robbins, explaining that the show would kick off with McCurdy being offered $300,000 of hush money to not publicly discuss her time at Nickelodeon or the men who took advantage of her. “We really enjoyed reading about how the producer and creator of iCarly pressured McCurdy into wearing bikinis, drinking alcohol underage, and massaging her without consent, and we’d really like to share that with our young viewers. We believe the 8- to 15-year-old demographic will find the scenes about Jennette being pressured into having an eating disorder very relatable. Plus, Jennette would finally have her own show.” At press time, Nickelodeon had tapped Dan Schneider to produce.