Lack Of Concrete Dinner Plans Leaves Power Vacuum Filled By Radical Pro-Tapas Fanatics

PRINCETON, NJ—With the entire evening now threatened by extremists, a lack of concrete dinner plans Friday left a power vacuum reportedly filled by radical pro-Tapas fanatics. “Without strong leadership deciding where to eat, those individuals pushing a rabid small plates agenda have taken on a troubling amount of sway,” said analyst Kirk Parry, confirming that the chaos began when the group discovered that the pizzeria they’d planned to attend was closed, leading to a troubling rise in the influence of those pushing to try a new Mediterranean place. “I’m afraid this is only the beginning, as now that these zealots have gotten a foothold, they’re likely to push even further, demanding bacon-wrapped figs and olive plates for everyone to share, completely reshaping the dinner plans with their twisted ideology.” Parry added that this massive shift in the power structure could lead to a counter-reactionary movement where everyone just ended up going to Burger King.