Advocacy and technological capacity for the potential colonization of other planets continues to grow, while critics of such proposals argue that these efforts will have negative consequences both for humanity and planet Earth. The Onion looks at the pros and cons of space colonization.
PRO
Massive waste of time, money, energy, and resources.
Alien soulmate could still be out there somewhere.
Easier to just scrap Earth at this point.
You know those bastards from Saturn would do it to us first if they had the chance.
CON
Leaving earth just when Broadway coming back.
We haven’t begun to explore how we can die on the ocean floor.
Moving sucks.
We shouldn’t go to another planet before bleeding this one dry first.
