Our Annual Year: Best Of April

Published:

December 14, 2020

The Onion

It Instantly Clear Girlfriend Used To Fuck Guy Being Mentioned In Anecdote

The Onion

Jared Kushner Says States Should Have Planned Ahead Before Joining The Union

The Onion

Wisconsin Primary Voters Receive ‘I Voted’ Gravestones

The Onion

Damning Report Finds White House Ignored Skeletal Horsemen Galloping Through Sky As Early As January

The Onion

Walgreens Introduces New Dumbass-Only Shopping Hours For Dipshits Who Don’t Know How To Stay 6 Feet Away

The Onion

‘It Was, For, Uh, Medical Reasons,’ Says Doctor To Boris Johnson, Explaining Why They Had To Give Him Haircut

The Onion

‘I Can Still Cook This, Right,’ Asks Woman Holding Up Writhing, Screaming Potato With 8-Foot-Long Roots

The Onion

Protesters Demand States Reopen, Notice Spike In Coronavirus Cases, Infuriate Them By Locking Down Again

The Onion

Man Not Sure Why He Thought Most Psychologically Taxing Situation Of His Life Would Be The Thing To Make Him Productive

The Onion

Potentially Promising Covid-19 Vaccine Hits Roadblock After Testing Reveals It’s Just Shotgun

The Onion

‘A Dash Of Soap Bubbles, 2 Pinches Of Sunshine, And Just A Drop Of Imagination’ Says Top Hat-Wearing Trump Pouring Ingredients Into Fizzing Concoction

The Onion

Trump Accuses New York Of Padding State’s Mortality Rate By Including African American Deaths

The Onion

North Korean Media Report Kim Jong-Un In Best Health Of Life After Receiving Hundreds Of Heart Transplants

The Onion

Undaunted Texas Waffle House Waitress Has Been Expecting To Die There Every Day For The Past 20 Years Anyway

Best of May 2020

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