Eagles Ask Fans To Throw Bottles Responsibly

PHILADELPHIA—Sources confirmed that the Philadelphia Eagles aired a stadium PSA before the kickoff of Monday night’s game asking fans to throw their bottles responsibly. “Hey fans, we’d like to take a moment to encourage all of those at Lincoln Financial Field to exercise good judgement when hurling beer bottles onto the field,” said quarterback Carson Wentz during the 30-second video played on the jumbotron, adding that it was important to make the game-day experience a safe and enjoyable one. “Please remember that you may only hurl beer bottles purchased in the stadium, and that throwing excessively may result in security being forced to escort you out of the game. And, of course, whipping beer bottles while under the age of 21 is strictly prohibited inside the stadium. Now let’s go, Eagles!” Sources confirmed that the video was immediately met by a chorus of deafening boos.