Onion Public Radio, Podcasts MIT Mad Scientists Say Corpse-Reanimation Still 10 Years Away Published: December 1, 2009 Advertising Obama Tells Nation He's Going Out For Cigarettes Continued on next page Explore Tags Vol 45: Issue 49 Related Coverage The Final Episode Of The Topical Papa John’s Comes Under Fire For Cruel Treatment Of The Bulbous, Deformed Creatures That Lactate Pizza Sauce Scientists Warn Americans To Stay Away From That Bird