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Area Man Eats Breakfast For Dinner In Desperate Attempt To Reinvent His Life

AKRON, OH—After taking stock of his life and coming to the sobering conclusion that he needed to make some serious changes, local man Gerry Harland reportedly opted to eat breakfast for dinner Tuesday in a desperate attempt to reinvent himself. “I figured it was time to stop sitting around waiting for good things to come my way and instead take some action,” said the man who forewent the decision to join a gym, seek a promotion, or enter a long-term relationship in his effort to find some fresh perspective in his life, opting instead to have scrambled eggs, several links of sausage, and two pieces of toast in place of a more conventional dish for his final meal of the day. “I’ve been putting this off for way too long, really. In a few years I’ll be 40, so the time to make a change is now. Otherwise, there’s no telling what kind of rut I’d dig myself into.” Harland added that in addition to switching up his diet, he also planned to change his TV-viewing habits, swapping primetime dramas for primetime situation comedies.

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