4-Year-Old Shows New Doll The Ropes

BIRMINGHAM, AL—According to sources, local 4-year-old Annie Platt spent much of Tuesday afternoon showing the ropes to her newest toy, a stuffed rag doll named Lucy. “You have to come to tea time when I say so, and stay away from Jerry the monkey, because he bites,” Platt said after familiarizing Lucy with the box of crayons, the beanbag chair, and the play stove, which the new doll is under no circumstances ever allowed to touch. “And remember, I’m in charge here, so I make the rules.” Later in the day, Platt reportedly forced Lucy to sit in the corner, allegedly for breaking nap time rules, but many in the playroom felt the toddler was simultaneously trying to establish her dominance over the newcomer while sending a warning to the other toys.