Ailing Castro Begins 750,000 Last Words

HAVANA—With his condition reportedly deteriorating, Cuban President Fidel Castro called top members of Cuba’s National Assembly to his side and embarked on what is believed to be his 750,000 final words, according to Radio Havana Cuba, which broadcast the first 36,000 words of his apparent farewell starting Monday. “I am not long for this world, comrades, so come close, and listen well,” began Castro, who was expected to scale back overnight with a mere 12,000 words from his deathbed, before fully resuming with a declaration of grievances and a discussion of Italian cinema in the morning. “…Until oppression and fear are rooted from this world, our lives may end, but our work will only begin. More water please.” Cuban government officials are reportedly working out a deal to publish the 80-year-old dictator’s historic last remarks as the next three volumes of Bartlett’s Familiar Quotations.