Lawyers Separate Mary-Kate & Ashley Olsen In 17-Hour Procedure

HOLLYWOOD—Attorneys representing Mary-Kate & Ashley Olsen separated the career-conjoined twins in a harrowing, 17-hour procedure Monday. “Because they lived symbiotically for so many years, the most difficult task was methodically detaching each of their shared credits,” said Divorah Kessler, one of the heroic lawyers on the five-person team. “After carefully removing the ampersand between their names and replacing it with a comma, we’ll attempt to construct an individual persona for each girl.” Lawyers on both sides list the girls’ chances for solo-career survival as “fair.”