Lone Geek Sits Off By Self Reading The Silmarillion Throughout Recess

BANGOR, ME—For the 17th consecutive recess period, unathletic pariah Jake Muncie sat off by himself Monday and read The Silmarillion, sources reported. The book, fantasy author J.R.R. Tolkien’s posthumously published account of the creation of Middle Earth and the subsequent Wars of the Silmarils, engaged the 12-year-old for the entire 33-minute recess period. Muncie reportedly positioned himself in a corner of the school cafeteria, far enough from his dodgeball-playing classmates to remain unmolested.