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Coffee No Longer Considered Carcinogenic

In a reversal of its previous determination that drinking coffee can cause cancer, the World Health Organization has announced they’ve actually found no evidence that coffee contains carcinogens. What do you think?

Isaac Ortberg • Systems Analyst

“Finally, we can begin reopening our nation’s shuttered cafés.”

Isaac Ortberg • Systems Analyst

Louise Shipman • Pond Skimmer

“I think they’ll change their minds once they find out about Dunkin’ Donuts’ Old Fashioned Butter Pecan Coffee Coolatta.”

Louise Shipman • Pond Skimmer

Gus Toller • Unemployed

“Nothing can kill me now!”

Gus Toller • Unemployed