Who’s Speaking At The DNC: Day 4

Here is a guide to the major speakers who will be addressing attendees on the final night of the 2016 Democratic National Convention:


Beth Mathias (Grant Coordinator):

Everyday woman working two jobs who really can’t afford to be taking this much time off


John Allen (Retired Gen., U.S. Marine Corps):

Will share an anecdote about how disappointed Hillary was after being told the commander-in-chief doesn’t lead the troops into battle herself


Gene Karpinski (President, League of Conservation Voters):

The environmental advocate will demand to know why the nation has not yet responded to his last 60 million emails


Barbara Mikulski (Senator, Maryland):

The longest-serving woman in the history of the U.S. Congress was sure as shit going to speak tonight


Chelsea Clinton (Vice Chair, Clinton Foundation):

Will use her speech to lay the groundwork for a potential fourth 10-year term as Hillary’s daughter


Hillary Clinton (Democratic Presidential Nominee):

This is the moment every Hillary Clinton at the convention has been waiting for




Sample front page of The Onion's DNC paper