Vague New Dating Site Caters To People Who Like To…You Know, Do That Certain Thing

SAN FRANCISCO—With a platform designed to achieve a high match rate among singles within its specific dating pool, a vague new dating site called “A Date” launched this week, catering to people who like to…you know, do that certain thing. “With ‘A Date,’ users can feel confident that when they sign up, they will only be paired with people who do or like or feel that, uh, common thing,” said spokesperson Garrett Pullen, adding that anyone who registered had to specify that they were single, looking to date, and had a passion, love, or interest in “it,” whatever “it” meant. “In today’s dating world, it can be hard to find someone who you can confidently say shares your…whatever you do. So take the guesswork out of dating! If that thing is what you do, then this is the place to go.” At press time, Pullen told reporters that the site had shut down after you know…that thing that was bad…uh, happened.