U.S. Gas Prices Fall After Single Nod From Figure At Head Of Table In Shadowy Boardroom

NEW YORK—Offering relief to consumers after months of feeling the squeeze, gas prices across the nation reportedly fell Friday after a single nod was issued from a figure at the head of a table in a shadowy boardroom. According to sources, the curt, nearly imperceptible motion set off a wave of low whispers and a scuttling of chairs from the extremities of the conference table, and sent dozens of aides in dark suits scurrying from the room in a panic. The silhouetted figure behind the magnanimous gesture reportedly remained stock-still at the vortex of the chaos as the average price of a gallon of gasoline began to drop in all 50 states and the District of Columbia, and leading economists’ fears of a looming recession were staved off. At press time, the entire boardroom had fallen silent once again, watching rapt as the figure vanished.