,

The Anti-Abortion Campaign

Bush’s signing of the Partial Birth Abortion Ban Act was a political triumph for the movement to curtail abortions in the U.S. What do you think?

Dawn Hulsey • Talent Director

“They’ve got God on their side. All we’ve got is science and reason.”

Dawn Hulsey • Talent Director

Todd Delrio • Painter

“Is it just me, or have national politics been sorta veering to the right a little since Bush was elected?”

Todd Delrio • Painter

Johnny Baron • Order Filler

“Before I make a decision on abortion, I’ll have to review the made-for-TV movies on the topic.”

Johnny Baron • Order Filler

Frank Eldridge • Systems Analyst

“Why can’t more American women be like Jessica Lynch? What do you mean, what do I mean?”

Frank Eldridge • Systems Analyst

Lillian Knighton • Mathematician

“I don’t think that people should play God—unless it’s in a cute way, in a Sunday-school gymnasium.”

Lillian Knighton • Mathematician

Phillip Krantz • Investor

“As an investor in back-alley real estate and wire-hanger futures, I say, ’Whoo-hoo!’”

Phillip Krantz • Investor




Sample front page of The Onion's DNC paper