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Study Finds Dolphins May Suffer From Alzheimer’s Disease

A study has found that the brains of some stranded dolphins showed classic markers of human Alzheimer’s disease, supporting the theory that “mass strandings” occur when one animal becomes confused and leads their pod into dangerously shallow waters. What do you think?

Sloane Castro •

“You always wo

Sloane Castro •

Burt Kraynak •

“That explains why that dolphin at the zoo never recognizes me.”

Burt Kraynak •

Nick Jaeger •

“Take away their driver’s licenses—protests be damned!”

Nick Jaeger •




Sample front page of The Onion's DNC paper