Local Social Conventions Published: May 25, 2010 Houseguest Just Going To Lie There Until Rest Of House Wakes UpMariachi Band Has No Idea Your Mother Just DiedMan Realizes Fly Has Been Down For Entire LifeFat Kid Successfully Avoids Ridicule By Swimming With Shirt OnGrandma Concerned About Dinner Roll Count’This Is The Happiest Day Of My Life,’ Lies Man Holding BabyTea-Party Host Struggling To Keep Conversation GoingNew Roommate Always ThereGaffe-Prone Biden Embarrasses Nation Yet Again By Sneezing During MeetingCEO’s Success Credited To Unbelievable Handshake Print Is Back. Get The Paper. Become A Member. Advertising Blackhawks Attempt To Find Out Why Shark On San Jose Logo Is Eating Hockey Stick Continued on next page Explore Tags Vol 46: Issue 19 Related Coverage Man Replies ‘STOP’ To Political Fundraiser Text Like Powerful Wizard Casting Spell To Ward Off Mythical Beast ‘I Can’t See It,’ Reports Child At Every Zoo Exhibit Husband Files For Divorce After DNA Test Reveals Child Only Shares Half His Genes