Several 2009 MLB Awards Clearly Thought Up On The Spot

NEW YORK—A number of players suggested to reporters Monday that, with accolades such as the AL Platinum Baseman Award and the Best Lead Off of the Year Trophy, the Baseball Writers’ Association of America was almost certainly making up its year-end honors on the spot. “When they were calling out the names of the awards and players, they were stammering and saying ’um’ and ’uh’ a lot,” said Tampa Bay Rays slugger and 2009 Best Batting Gloves Award winner Evan Longoria. “I’d never heard of that award until five minutes ago. Same with the Pretty Good Bunter Award.” Longoria added, however, that if there is now such a thing as the Hitter of the Year Goblet, he might as well try to win it.